That is true dan... you after after all a total beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep! :-D

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I still think it's worth a conversation with her. Mort is asking how to handle this, so it clearly isn't that clear cut for him.

Where's the harm in asking her why she doesn't want mutual friends to think they are bf and gf? She could have been testing him to see if he said "Why, we are bf and gf?!".

Women do weird things like that.

If she says "because I don't want to be your gf" or "I don't think of you that way" then he can go off and date the other woman with everyone knowing where they stand!

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Thanks for the replies - they're much appreciated.

Having read through my initial post, I realise I probably come across as a bit of shit which wasn't my intention (I guess that what comes from writing a long post too quickly!)

I'm not suggesting that the details of her operation have made me think about seeing someone else. I didn't mean that at all. Obviously it's going to have an impact on any relationship that there may or may not currently be, but I guess I need to decide how much of an impact that has on me personally. It's just that after her only seeing her for 6 weeks or so, it's quite a big decision to make. The last thing I want for her is to confide in me only for it not to work out.

I think that that coupled with the fact that when we have tried to talk about the relationship in general she has been less than forthcoming has lead to frustration on my part ... hence the flattery at being asked out by someone else.

I've put her comments such as her saying that she doesn't want to lead me on ... or not wanting to be seen as bf and gf down to her not wanting to be a burden. But her reluctance is now getting to that point now where I'm not so sure, and trying to talk about it hasn't really yielded any clues.

That's why I'm considering ending it rather than any operation ... although I guess that's playing some kind of a part in the whole relationship even if it is indirectly.

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Nobody thinks you are a sh*t Mort! You clearly aren't.

Have you asked her outright whether she wants a relationship with you?

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Just end it... she is too high maintenance already.

Are you going to marry her? Nooooooooo

Are you in love with her? Noooooooooo

So move on.

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