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Thanks for the great and v helpful advice guys, it really is appreciated. I’ll try and answer your points in one post!
I feel like I need to go somewhere quiet and get my head together. It can be hard to concentrate here because my team is quite demanding and I’m constantly reviewing things, being asked questions or other interruptions. Hatter you asked if I had any solutions, and I don’t right now. I might be able to come up with some given a bit of head-space to think though. Perhaps that’s what I should do before setting up a meeting with my manager or his manager.
I agree I need to detail down all the issues I have. At the moment it’s all too ‘loose’.
We are a very small company so we don’t have any HR. One manager is responsible for HR (although isn’t trained!) and I’m not sure how much I trust her to be honest. She’s very matey with the CEO so everything would probably go straight back to him. So I guess I need to think about whether or not to get her involved too. Hmmmmm!
The problem with the specific work issues are few-fold I suppose. Partly it’s to do with the worry about changes that are being planned without consulting me. It’s not the changes as such, some of them are quite exciting, however I know for a fact that the people round that table do not know all the facts and aren’t considering everything – but me vocalising that to people above me kind of indicates that I don’t have faith in what they are doing (which I don’t of course!). I’d have to find the right way to say it I suppose.
It isn’t just the changes above though, the changes on my level have also impacted on me. I have no idea where the division of responsibility is/should be between me and my colleague on various projects. I raised this in my appraisal in January but nothing has been made any clearer.
As I have mentioned before, he seems to be doing all the ‘ideas’ work and I’m doing all the ‘doing’ work. I’m so much more capable than that but my time seems to be spent making his last idea happen (worrying about the budget, that it's being done in a professional way, that the message is right etc).
I’m loathe to look for other jobs right now. My first set of exams are coming up in the first week of June so I really need my non-work attention focussed on them. I then get a break from June until the start of September (a total break, no study required) so perhaps that would be the best time to look around and see what’s out there. I definitely need to move on (I totally agree about the grade bump Gubes) but I want it to be for the right role, and not just because I’m stressed and unhappy here. Maybe that’s naïve of me but I’d at least like to try and make things better here for me.
I don’t have to finish the course straight away once my June exams are done. I could defer the other two modules, or just do them one at a time (which would of course be more manageable). My original plan was to do the whole thing as quickly as possible so I could get my qualification and ‘do one’ from here. Ideally I’d like to get it done asap; it will help my job search a lot.
Since my boss has been my boss we’ve probably had 5 one to ones (in about 18 months), and records are never kept unless it’s the official appraisal/review. That sort of thing isn’t really his strong point.
FATBOY absolutely hit the nail on the head, my line manager likes having me report to him. It means all the work my department do, he can take credit for but it doesn’t impact on him whatsoever. This means that I take responsibility for all of the work, with no direction and support. I suppose the buck would stop at him if anything were to go wrong, but he’s confident enough in my abilities to know that wouldn’t happen.
They put me at this level because they felt I was inexperienced, but then have done nothing to alter that situation. I think they think paying for me to do this course is all they need to do.
Sorry for moaning on. Thanks for listening and helping me organise my thoughts. I’m going to look at the diary and see if I can take some time out this week to have a proper think.
Since my boss has been my boss we’ve probably had 5 one to ones (in about 18 months), and records are never kept unless it’s the official appraisal/review. That sort of thing isn’t really his strong point.
would it help e-mailing a memo of such meetings back to the person that held it after.
*i'm just guessing*
I've been how you are, and I still really don't like my job, but i've started to look at it differently. It was getting me really down so I decided to change (with a little help from the McJim meister). I do the amount of work that is expected of me now, nothing more. It has reduced my workload by a tonne and I'm not as stressed. I'm also doing a lot of planning for the future in both work and family areas. That's kept my mind off stressing about my current job.
Its not much help, but I'm the most cynical, moody stroppy git in the world and I've changed my viewpoint, so it might be easier for you to get out of this rut with the right tools.
First of all brave you for saying it out loud on here! I read your opening couple of paragraphs and can relate to exactly how you feel - been there, done it and got the t-shirt.
One thing that struck me a bit is you might be suffering from an element of burnout - 'a condition whereby previously motivated, productive people suffer from emotional, physical and mental exhaustion. ...Symptoms of which include feeling powerless, drained, resentful, irritable, etc' (taken from Lonely Plant: 132 Seize the Days), and that you need to take a step back from the situation.
The advice to speak to your boss about the situation is very good, and even if it goes against how you feel, I think it should be the first avenue that you persue. You probs wouldn't like it if one of your reports went straight to him with a problem/issue when you weren't there, so it is only fair that you give him a chance to try to turn the situation around before you go to his boss. And, get in sooner, rather than later, as you don't want the situation to get to blowing point. Use this week, when he is not there to develop a strong case of bullet point to talk with him about your situation.
What about talking to your colleague and having a double plan of attack? He is producing more work, and as a team you need extra resource to deliver what you need to do. Thereby you are not the problem bearer, it is a wider issue, and you have a solution to go with it.
If you re-read the original post, you'll see that a lot of it refers to how you feel. That may be the key to how you deal with it.
The situation sounds pretty cruddy, and you feel understandably negative about it - "out of control" and "unhappy", and the latter often follows the former. I get the impression that you hope somebody can sort something out - maybe they can, and maybe you can be that person.
There appears to be a lack of strategic direction in the organisation - nothing to give you direction. So, can you give direction to your bit of the organisation?
I suspect you may be asking for things "what do we do?", "how does it fit together?", and hoping for answers from people you suspect don't have clue. Can you turn it round, and say "We should be doing X, Y and Z. Am I right?" or "This is our priority because..." If you are wrong, and least they have to tell you and explain it.
There's a fine line between positive thinking and controlled hysteria - you don't need to be stupidly optimistic, but you can try to find some positives and build on them.
I was more surprised about your comment about not knowing what to do about a communications strategy. This is where networking comes in - find someone who can point you in the direction of a good one. Discuss your ideas at an early stage so you get buy-in from your manager.
The other thing to be careful about, is that you sound as if you think you are asking for something personally from the organisation if you ask for help. You have a right to support and direction (as long as it doesn't develop into neediness) because it should enable the organisation to function more effectively.
Other things to think about:
Who are your allies in the organisation? Can they help?
Are there any areas of your life can you sort out, so work may seem less of a problem?
What attracted you to the job - and can you get it back?
I think I'd agree with most of the points that Claudio's made.
I was in a similar position a year or two ago; I'd started working for a company on a huge project which was badly managed, bad choices had been made through the design process and nothing was getting done; the team I was working with did a lot of complaining and several people (who I probably got along best with) ended up leaving.
I tackled it by listing everything that I thought was a problem, described why I thought it was a problem and gave a couple of possible solutions that would resolve them. I had one of the guys on my team have a read through to make sure I was being reasonably objective and then presented it to the division director, who I didn't really have a working relationship with but knew to be a straight talking bloke (a proper yorkshireman if you will!! :-). Off the back of that they did make some pretty major changes to the project and things started moving again.
It's probably worth pointing out that, even after all the changes had been made, I only lasted another month or two before leaving though this was probably as much down to people leaving and wanting to reduce my commute time.
I think my situation was slightly different but I'm sure there's parallels that can be drawn. If you're not happy about the situation you've really only got 3 choices:
1. Put up and shut up
2. Quit
3. Do something to affect change
The first isn't going to make you any happier about the situation and the second doesn't necessarily sound like a good idea for you at the moment. I think the best thing you can do is to have a look at what you think the problems are and how to resolve them and then try to have a discreet word with someone who's in a position to act on the advice you give. Anyone can complain about their situation but a decent manager will appreciate if you give honest, decent and objective advice that has the company's best interests in mind.
I’ve switched some things around and I’m taking tomorrow off work to get my head together. I’ve noted all your suggestions and I’m going to work through them and have a bit of a brainstorm away from the office as to the various elements of my discontent and some possible suggestions as to how they can be improved.
Taking Claudio’s advice I’m going to have a think about the direction of the business too and what suggestions I can offer.
There are so many different elements to my feeling this way I need to properly organise my thoughts!
I agree with Ben and I think I will go direct to my line manager when he’s back. The way I feel about the level above him right now is not good (even more crap has happened since my original post!). I owe him that much, and if he doesn’t do anything to help/change things based on our conversation (which I will make sure is documented) then I will go over his head.
I think I do have lots of allies in the organisation. I’m pretty well respected here I reckon. The problem is that most of my allies are at mine or a lower level in the hierarchy! I do probably have one above me, but I’ve been told by my boss not to trust them for different reasons! Although perhaps my boss has his own reasons for telling me that! Hmmm!
You’ve all given me lots to think about. Thanks again :)
