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Talk / Time off / Chatting / Re: Suicide

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By Ender, Mon 23 Jun at 10:46pm 
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yea, they they came to me with their problems and I helped out as best I could, i hope. there's always going to be part of em that wonders if I couldnt have done more but it was such a sudden and out of character thing, so sudden.

when i got to that point I did what you did and used it to push myself out of that hole. i can recognise I work better when Im under pressure or under attack so I welcome it now, as a testing stone.

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Re: Suicide

By Dan Miskzuecf, Mon 23 Jun at 11:15pm 
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I just think it's unfair to comment on individual cases. This guy could have had a beauty spot and people could have called him cocopop face for all I know. No one knows why he did it, except the man himself.

I'm not going to judge him, either way, and I think it is unfair on people to judge people who committed suicide. All I'll say is, I'm very sorry that they felt that that action was their only option left in life, and that I morti non solo piu soli.

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Re: Suicide

By Ben, Mon 23 Jun at 11:21pm 
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DoubleNine wrote:

in the absence of a suicide note, there is a total vacuum for those left behind and a different type of judgement based on an immediate reaction will take the place of any explanation.



We've been talking about this tonight, as my Mum and I share the same view that unless there is a note, there is no clear reason why it was done. There will always be a question mark to the people left. Yes, you can summise the reasons why, but you will never know the definitive truth. My Dad couldn't really grasp this point.

I also think that there is a stigma attached to suicide, as if it is somehow wrong? Is it? Yes, it is illegal (as much use as that is), but it happens.

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Re: Suicide

By greg, Mon 23 Jun at 11:25pm 
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was it a cry for help do you think, or did he definitely mean to do it?

it's probably worth mentioning places like CALM exist, as depression amongst young men is especially common.

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Re: Suicide

By Ender, Mon 23 Jun at 11:27pm 
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the dead are no longer lonely.

Of course its wrong. There's always another way out, always support. Its such a terrible, terrible waste.

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Re: Suicide

By Science Boy, Mon 23 Jun at 11:59pm 
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Hey Ben,

So sorry to hear about the situation and feel for you and your family.
I've washed blood from a mates wrists/hands many a time when he tried to top himself and once searched and hauled his drunken/drugged body out of a river in the middle of the night.
The problem is that some people hide depression very well and it really can come as a shock. They might seem grand on the outside.

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Re: Suicide

By Chris, Tue 24 Jun at 10:14am 
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Benny, youcan talk to me if you need to. xx

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Re: Suicide

By sassycat64, Tue 24 Jun at 10:47am 
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My heart goes out to your aunt and to all concerned Ben :o(

Edited Tue 24 Jun at 11:29am

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Re: Suicide

By PJ, Tue 24 Jun at 10:52am 
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Ben - my heart goes out to you, your family and all involved.

Suicide is a brutal end - the last act becomes the most significant event in their life.

It is a death that everyone involved feels they could/should have prevented but it is impossible to change the last decision the person made.

The Samaritans are an organisation who listen to anyone in crisis, not just the suicidal, but those affected by it.

The national numbers are:

UK: 08457 909090

ROI: 1850 609090

or e-mail jo@samaritans.org

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Re: Suicide

By Ben, Tue 24 Jun at 5:55pm 
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Cheers guys for your kind words -

Even though I never really knew the guy, my godparents may as well be blood relatives, as I see more of them than the few 'real' aunts/uncles that I do have. I can't even imagine what they must be feeling right now.

Last night I went to bed thinking about it and had a bit of a disturbed sleep, but one thing that does get me is that the last time he was seen was on Friday, and then he was found yesterday: the hang yourself and know that you won't be found means that you have done it to be the end. It cannot have been a cry for help situation, if you get me. I just think for someone, anyone to be dead, no matter by what means, for a number of days before they are found is just horrible.

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