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I don't think you ever get over a miscarriage. I know I haven't. My g/f had one last year and it's was a difficult time for both of us but I felt pain for her more than anything.
She loved being pregnant and really had a glow about her, she was so excited and it broke my heart to see her so upset after we lost the baby at 20weeks.
Thankfully we now have a little boy who is beautifully and means the world to us, and my g/f is such a natural mum, she amazes me with her commitment to him and her life is dedicated to him.
The worst part of the miscarriage for me was how long it took, for such an awful thing you just want it to be over.
She started bleeding all of a sudden really and I got a call at my work, she was crying because she had started bleeding. it happened after she had been moving some wardrobes because one of the cats had caught a mouse and she was trying to get to the mouse, she felt a pain in her side and the bleeding followed soon after.
We went to the hospital and had a scan, I was praying for the baby to be OK but unfortunately we were told she had miscarried.
We waited in the clinic for a few hours until everything had past. She was inconsolable & I knew I had to stay strong for her which was hard. She blamed herself for the miscarriage & it took a while for her to realise that it was just one of those thinks & could have happened at anytime.
I don't think I really grieved until a few month after. My g/f was suffering from depression and all I was concerned about was for her welfare, then one day I just broke down. I cried my little heart out and not until then did I grieve for what had happened.
Like I said, I've never really got over what had happened but unlike Will we never named the child and to be honest I like to think that it was never a part of this world. We refused to know what sex it was. I like the thought Will has of the guardian angel, that's a really nice thought.
My boy is 6months old today, I love watching him grow & learn. It's so full filling. When i come home from work and see his face light up when he see's me is just an incredible feeling and I am such a better person for it.
My boy is 6months old today, I love watching him grow & learn. It's so full filling. When i come home from work and see his face light up when he see's me is just an incredible feeling and I am such a better person for it.
I have been reading this thread with interest. Some really well written and heart wrenching posts. It certainly makes me appreciate how smoothly things have gone so far for me and the gf. I can't begin to imagine the emotions you went through.
It's often harder for the men in some ways. Miscarriage isn't something that I've gone through but several close friends have, and usually the women get lots of attention and are able to talk things through with friends - we're generally better at that sort of stuff anyway - and the men feel like they have to be strong and hold everything together for everyone else. It's very hard when you don't feel strong or able to provide support and you may not have anyone to talk to about it, or even feel able to articulate how you feel anyway.
I really feel for all of you who've gone through it. You never forget it.
Thanks! Yeah, I've been reading for a while but only signed up the other day. I was a regular on MH, but it's pants now, and I post on boditronics sometimes too.
